Finding comfort in other people's pain....

I have found much healing in reading the accounts of other women's battle with PPD. The first book I read was Down Comes the Rain by Brooke Shields. I was completely blown away when I read this book, honestly. I expected to read another women's story... the emotions she felt and the actions she took to try to make herself healthy. But what I actually read when I turned the pages was my own story. I couldn't believe it. Yes, the circumstances were different. The people were different. But at the core of her story, she felt the same things I felt. She said the same things I said. She lived in the same fog I lived in. I just couldn't believe that this celebrity that lives thousands of miles from me (physically, socially, and spiritually) lived the same life I was leaving.
I know there are many women that suffer from this disease, but I've never had the opportunity to talk to any of these women. Through this whole experience, from the very beginning, I have felt so very alone. But as I read the words on those pages, I suddenly wasn't alone. I wasn't a freak. Someone else felt the same things I felt. I have struggled to put my emotions into words... but she did it for me. She made words for my thoughts. What an amazing feeling!!! In some ways, I feel this book buried me deeper in my depression, because suddenly I wasn't making up these feeling.... they were really, really real. But I don't look on this as a bad thing... I think I needed to hit the bottom in that way in order to start reaching up.
Currently I am reading Living Beyond Post Partum Depression by Jerusha Clark. Once again, I am amazed .... I am reading my story again. Jerusha documents not only her experience but also serveral other women who have survived PPD. And their words are my words. Their feelings are my feelings. Their actions are my actions.
It breaks my heart that so many women suffer from this disease. This is one of those feelings that you hope and pray no one else on the face of the earth ever has to experience. Kind of a "I'll take this on myself if that means no one else ever has to experience it" type of thing. Unfortunatly, thousands of women suffer every year.
However, I do appreciate hearing their stories and knowing I'm not alone. Such a comfort to know my feelings are felt by others!