Those words broke my heart. But the feelings were mutual.... I missed me, too. I had, once again, lost myself and I couldn't find me anywhere. And I had tried... really, really hard!
So I caved and I got the pills back out. This was not at all what I wanted to do. A small part of me actually thought that feeling all these intense emotions was good. I was getting in touch with feelings that I had been suppressing for a long time. I thought if I could continue to feel these feelings like I was, I could work through them once and for all and just be done with them. I was afraid if I medicated myself again, I would "lose" those emotions and I would just become a blank, emotionless slate. And I knew that wouldn't benefit anyone.
But my husband told me he missed me. I couldn't allow that. I had to find me for him. So that's what I have set out to do....
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